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Finding Passion in Mid-Life

by Dotsie Bregel

Honey? It’s Dad. I’m at the emergency room with Mother and the doctor wants her to see an oncologist before she leaves. They think she has cancer.”

I had no clue how Dad’s words would change my life.

I was absorbed in family life as a stay-at-home mom. Volunteering at schools, church, and neighborhood defined me. Mom’s news made me drop every bit of it except one project so I could help care for her. I’ll never regret it.

The diagnosis was cancer. She chose treatments and they sucked the life right out of her. She survived seven heart-wrenching months. The Lord took her Irish soul to dance the streets of heaven on St. Patrick’s Day shortly after we feasted on corned beef and cabbage in the next room.

I felt a void and lack of purpose following Mom’s death. No longer volunteering or caring for Mom, my days were long. My oldest was soon leaving for college with the two younger ones flying the coop shortly behind him. What was I going to do with my life? I felt empty. What did I want to be when I grew up?

I’ve always looked at life as seasons: a time to work, a time to raise children, and a time to… well, what exactly? That was the question.

I recall the time my husband and I wanted to start our family. We endured four years of infertility. That was another time life was on hold. Aching to have a baby, we adopted our son and got pregnant while waiting for our little girl to arrive from Korea. We had three children in three years. Life has been a wonderful roller coaster ride, but the ride’s coming to a halt. I’m at the other end and find myself searching again.

What do you do when life throws you for a loop? It happens to all of us at some point. Women divorce, lose jobs, have kids move, loose loved ones, and life goes on. How do you find your purpose? Here are five tips that helped me through my soul searching and gave me a renewed sense of meaning.

Spend time alone

Set aside time each day for quiet reflection. Journal, pray, and consider your purpose in life. What is important to you? Why are you here? Make lists and work it out on paper. Listen to what God is whispering.

Focus on God-given gifts

Consider what brings you joy. What makes you tick? What are you passionate about? Is there something you can do with that passion to rejuvenate your life? God gives all of us gifts. Tune in and decide how to use them to fulfill your life purpose. Work isn’t a hardship when you align your passions with your profession.

Open up to others
Don’t be shy. Tell loved ones what you are going through. They know you best and can share your strengths and weaknesses. They can help you discover what to do with your life. Rely on them for advice and guidance.

Research
Get online and do career searches. Today’s technology allows you to post a few words in a program and have a list of careers at your fingertips. Use community colleges’ occupation databases. Sign up for a class that piques your interest. Go to the library. Hit bookstores. Wander the aisles until something strikes you and read ferociously.

Get busy
Be diligent until you have answers. Work at your future with enthusiasm. You are the one in charge. Make changes. Soul search. You’ll be glad you did!

I realize the pause in life after Mom’s death was serendipitous. It prepared me for the empty nest staring me in the face.
I applied the above tactics and am now blessed as the Executive Founder of BoomerWomenSpeak.com and the National Association of Baby Boomer Women. I’m passionate about education and empowering baby boomer women. I believe every woman has a story and when we share them, lives are changed. There is no need for us to feel alone. We have more similarities than differences. We are capable of healing one another by sharing our stories. Knowing another woman has lived, survived, and thrived through a similar circumstance gives us strength.
BoomerWomenSpeak.com is a safe and therapeutic haven to share what’s on your heart anonymously and without judgment. Wise, warm, and witty women with kindred spirits share thoughtful insight. Women feel appreciated, affirmed and needed by others in the community.
 

Dotsie Bregel is the Founder of the National Association of Baby Boomer Women, www.nabbw.com, and Boomer Women Speak, www.boomerwomenspeak.com, the number one site on all search engines for “baby boomer women”. Dotsie established the association, the only one dedicated to serving the healthiest, wealthiest, and best-educated group of women to reach midlife, to support and encourage women to live out their dreams. She is a writer, speaker, and expert on issues concerning her generation of women. Dotsie is passionate about educating and empowering midlife women through her wildly successful Web sites, including more than 60 forums that act as a virtual village for boomers.

Dotsie has been mentioned in Time magazine and AARP Bulletin among dozens of newspapers across the nation. She frequently does radio interviews and appeared on The Early Show (CBS) with Dave Price. She is on the Editorial Board for me* magazine and writes book reviews for boomer magazine. You may contact her at dots@boomerwomenspeak.com or 1-877-bboomer.
 

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